We blame ourselves, and we blame God. We say that it’s not fair for us to go through such pain. We say that life has been too hard on us. We say that no one can feel the pain that we feel. We say this life isn’t worth living. Self-pity and depression overtake us.
No more can we see the beauty in life. The flowers look grey, and the sun never shines. Laughter is for those who know happiness. Love is for the lucky. Smiles for those who know no pain.
Millions around the world are crying out for help, yet we only see our pain. We only see the misery that surrounds our lives. We are so consumed in ourselves that we fail to see the people reaching out for us, trying and trying to help us crawl out of our pit. We moan for our losses. Cry for our pain. Despair at our pitiful lives.
The cry of desperation is one of the world, not just us. The frustration, the weeping, the confusion, the blame, they are universal feelings. We live in a broken world, full of pain and disappointments.
We’re not the only ones who beg for pain to go away. We aren’t the only ones who fill our pillows with tears. We aren’t the only ones who hide in our closet to get away from the constant reminders of loss. We aren’t the only ones who search for something to blame. We aren’t the only ones seeking for light in the darkness.
We all lose something, we all feel pain, we all despair, yet we all forget to comfort, to heal, to listen. We forget that the loss we experience is experienced by so many others. We forget that the pain we go through affects others too. In our desperation, we forget that there is hope.
We are broken selfish beings. So caught up in our own misery that we fail to see others. We are humans who weep for our losses, be they great or small. We are lonely, self-pitying fools. We are humans, constantly falling into the pit some horrendous devil set up for us.
This pit purposely hides us from the sun. This life-sucking devil tells us that this is where we belong. It lies to us, telling us that we’re the only ones who ever felt pain. It tells us that despair is our life, that we will never feel happiness again. It tells us that the emptiness that we feel is impossible to fill. It lies to us, making us believe that laughter and smiles are something fake. And while it’s lying to us, it digs our pit deeper and deeper.
In this pit, we neglect the most beautiful sights. We close our eyes to the colors that were created out of the darkness. We never see the rays of sunshine forcing their way through the clouds. Laughter, we begin to believe, is for those who are happy; yet, the greatest laughter comes out of pure joy. The purest smiles are those who put on a brave face; they know that others are going through as much as they are.
We lie and we are lied to. We have ruts and holes that aren’t being filled. And while billions of people are experiencing the same things, we still fill empty. We expect others to complete us. We expect others to reach out and help us. We expect others to make us feel better.
Yet even we cannot fill these voids. Even we cannot restore the empty soul. Even we cannot give laughter and smiles back. Even we cannot provide a way out.
But there is One that can fill our voids. He offers to restore our souls. He offers us laughter and smiles, and urges us to accept. He provides a way out of our pit of despair and self-pity.
This is the One that teaches us love isn’t for the lucky, it’s for the broken hearts. He opens our eyes to the color. He shows us the little rays of light through the dark, dark clouds. He warms our hearts when grief tries to overtake us.
He dries our tears. He sits with us in our closets. He takes our accusations and blame, even when it’s completely uncalled for. He opens His arms, and holds us ‘til the sobbing is changed to laughter, the tears turn into smiles. He allows us to yell and scream at Him, all the while reminding us that He loves us.
He doesn’t explain why something happened, but He gives us a peace that surpasses all understanding. He doesn’t expect us to get over our loss, pain, and desperation, yet He promises that a vibrant life is found in Him. He urges us to stay away from the pit, and shows us another way. And when we do fall into it, He’s the one who pulls us out.
This is the One we try blaming. He is God. He is Grace. He is Love. He knows pain, loss, and desperation. He is calling to us, crying out in our darkness. Pleading for us to come home, to give up our self-seeking ways.
He’s ready to comfort us in our loss. He’s ready to weep with us. He’s ready to fill our desperation with hope. He is ready to pull us out. He is ready to fill that pit. He’s ready to make us new.
He is ready, but we refuse to accept.
We continue weeping alone. We continue to feel empty. We continue to see in grey colors. We continue to block out the sun. We continue to blame, when we’re the only ones at fault.
We still feel desperate. Our void grows larger and larger. We give in to the voice of the devil. We refuse to feel happy. We still say it’s dark. We still feel like there’s no comfort for our pain. We don’t trust the God who yearns to make it all better.
Our cry of desperation is now louder. Our frustration with God is still present. We still weep alone. We are still confused, and our energy is still lacking. Our souls are emptier than ever. Yet we remain stubborn.
We seek out happiness through fame, fortune, sex, drugs, and entertainment. We smile at obscene pictures of darkness, laugh at perverted jokes. We fill our loneliness with sounds of evil. It only last for a moment, and then we fall back into our pit, deeper still. But we refuse once again to accept the offer to take it all away.
We lie to ourselves, saying that this pain can’t be taken away. We tried, we tell ourselves, but no one wants to help us; there’s nothing we can do about it. We think that nothing could fill this void. We forget that beauty, light, and colors exist. Again, we are shown a flower in the concrete, the light of the moon, or a glimpse of a rainbow, but again we close our eyes, letting the tears roll down our face instead.
Finally, we stop trying. We can’t climb out of our pit to find temporary solutions because it’s so deep. We have become so consumed with our own pity that we can’t feel anything else. We are so heavy with our own emptiness that we can’t move. We are so used to constantly closing our eyes that we can’t even see anymore. We are nearly deaf from the noise we surrounded ourselves with.
Yet in the midst of the chaos that we’ve put ourselves in, we hear a shout. A far off cry, repeating our names, over and over and over again. “You! Yes, you! You are loved! You! I haven’t stopped trying! You! I will save you!”.
And in that moment, light consumes our pit. We see a hand reaching for us. We see a face, full of love and truly beautiful. We hear the voice say, “My beloved, come to me. I will comfort you. I will take away your pain. Just come to me”.
So we try to reach out, but we are so weak that we can’t even lift our arms. We try to speak, but we are still so consumed with self-pity that all that comes out is weeping and wailing. We try to touch His hand, but we cannot. That is enough for Him. He climbs into our pit, picks us up, and carries us out.
He begins to fill our now empty pit one tear at a time. He weeps and weeps, all the while holding us in His arms. He weeps for our pain. He weeps at our desperation. He weeps for our foolishness. His tears wash away our pain.
When the weeping ends, we can see again. We are kneeling before a cross. We look behind us, our pit is filled with tears, and blood. The man that pulled us out of our pit is on this cross. His arms that held us have nails in them. His beautiful face is scarred by beatings, and on top of His head is a crown of thorns. His blood is pouring out from His many wounds, covering us, and rolling down into our pit.
In our shower of His blood and tears, our pain is lifted, our loneliness runs from us. We see colors, and light, and beauty. Our desperation is replaced by hope. Our losses are restored. Our self-pity replaced with Love.
We are made new. We have become beautiful sons and daughters of the Man on the cross. Our pit of despair no longer exists. Our soul is no longer empty. Love is filling and overflowing it.
In another moment of desperation, the devil, disguising as loss and pain again, tries to pounce on us again, tries to drag us back into a pit. But this time, we find our comfort in the arms of our Savior. This time we have a shield surrounding us. This time we have accepted protection.
We have accepted that Someone cared so much, that He would suffer so that we would have Someone to comfort us. We have accepted that loss is a part of life, but He wants to restore it. We have accepted the confusion, because Someone knows how it will end. We have accepted the blood poured out for us. We have accepted the body broken for us.
We have accepted Jesus.
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